Spring!

So Sistah Sledge has been carrying the weight of this blog for the past month and a half. I am long overdue on an update – as you are all aware she has pursued this 30 day cleanse. Which I think is insane, but props to her for being disciplined and finding a way to make meatballs from nuts and ground chicken. I decided to give up chocolate for lent. Not so much for religious purposes, but more because bikini season is quickly approaching and I’m always jonesin for anything chocolate (there have been some days where I considered shaking out my keyboard at work to see if there was anything in there – disgusting, I know). Once Easter rolls around the baking begins – and I’m slathering anything and everything in Nutella.

The house search has continued and I actually put an offer on a house that was cute and could easily house the chickens I’ve been wanting. But of course I’m an idiot magnet and the guy who owns the house was a jerkface so we’re back to square one. Putting an offer on a house is really an interesting experience – you sit there and scheme up a number, decide if you need certain inspections (bring on the lead paint!), put it all in a long winded contract then bam! Offer is submitted and you sit and wait, and then check your phone religiously until the realtor calls. I decided that I should be seeking the help of the crazies on Extreme Couponing, and do a little spin off – Extreme Lowballing. I want to see if these women can get a house dirt cheap, or hell – even for free!

In addition to the abode search continuing – spring has presented the opportunity to enjoy one of my favorite past times – gardening! I am not a horticulture expert like Sistah Sledge – however with her sensei wisdom and my googling skills, I think this year’s garden is off to a good start. I went to a new place, Comstock Ferre, that has heirloom seeds – basically it’s like Hogwarts. Found some really awesome plants (pretty much a slew of tomatoes and other exotic vegetables I’ve never heard of) and sowed! Hopefully these plants will be planted in my own yard this year – time will tell!

Onward and upward!

Day 3 = FAILURE!  But whatever.  So I had a little wine.  It was at least red wine.  Full of antioxidants and very good for you, riiiight??  I say so.

Anyways, I decided to put my failures behind me and look at my future successes, my garden!  I bought seeds this year from a new place, Hudson Valley Seed Library.  It's a neat organization where you can send in your seeds from the season and continue the growth of heirloom seeds.  They best be good or I'm going back to my CT based seed company!

So here's Day 1 of something I am completely passionate about!  Looking forward to weeding in my bikini, and growing some greens!  Farmers unite!

Day 1

I want chocolate.
I want chocolate.
I want chocolate.
I want chocolate.

Oh, sorry.

It's Day 1 of this cleanse.  So far, I think I have complained to anyone who will listen about how hungry I am.  It's only Day 1.  And I seriously have been eating non stop - fruits, chicken, salad, hard boiled eggs, 18 lbs of pistachios (ok, perhaps that's an exaggeration, but still, my fingers hurt from the salt - that's probably  not allowed on this cleanse either, whoops!), 4 bacon wrapped scallops, cauliflower mash.....I know, this all sounds gloriously filling, doesn't it?  IT'S NOT!  I'm lying on the floor dying ovah here!

Perhaps I'm playing this up a little over dramatically, but this is apparently a lesson in the fact that I have ZERO will power.  And guess what - I don't need it since I come from good stock, and good genes!  But yet, here I am, cleansing the soul.

If no one hears from me, please send chocolate, and lots of it!  Here's to Day 2!  And no chocolate, fingers crossed.

It's time to cleanse!

I've decided.  I'm doing a 30 day cleanse, The Whole30, to be exact.  My friend Cartzy convinced me to give it a whirl, with a strong twist of my Gumby arm.  Basically, it's no dairy, no pasta, no bread, no carbs, nothing delicious....oh sorry, I digress.  Oh, and no ALCOHOL!  How shall I live without my wine for 30 days???  I'll figure it out, damnit!

So tomorrow marks Day 1.  It will start out with no sugar or milk in my coffee, replaced with coconut milk.  Doesn't that sound delish?  (sarcasm, sarcasm, sarcasm...)  AV is doing this with me, but he could live on bland chicken and boring steamed vegetables for 30 years, let alone 30 days.  I've been trying to convince SistahSlice to play along, but so far, she's not having it.  I have a feeling I'm going to grow really tired of sweet potato and cauliflower, and may offer up my first born child for some chocolate or some wine.  Or vodka!   The next few posts may turn into total whine sessions (wine-sessions??) about my withdrawals, but I'm starting my seeds soon for Farm de Sledge, so hopefully that will be a distraction.

Here's to 30 more days!  I should get a coin if I finish this successfully!

Come out come out where ever you are!

We know you are out there! We know you're reading this fantabulous blog.  Follow US!

It's about to get feisty up in here!

Bessie is BACK!

Annnnnnnnd, she's BACK!  Bessie had a glorious visit at the local Agway, and after a relaxing week at the Spa, she's back and ready to rock the yard.

Now the next question is, what project to start on first??

Sunday Funday

We hunkered down Sunday night for what has been turning into our Sunday Funday.  PBR!

No, I'm not talking about Pabst Blue Ribbon beer, I'm talking about Professional Bull Riding!  But tonight there was an added bonus.  Jousting!

For weeks, during the PBR, they have been promoting this new show on the History channel, Full Metal Jousting.  My first thought?  Medieval Times here we come.  Sure, everyone's probably been on vacation someplace, enjoyed a lovely meal of a big, honkin' Turkey leg and some other form of food you have to eat with your hands, watch the grease drip down your forearm, and vote for your favorite knight.  It's wonderful dinner theater, really.

But apparently, Full Metal Jousting is different!  This is real joust to joust contact. Riding on a horse, trying to impale your fellow knight with an 11 foot long pole, made of one piece of Douglas Pine Fir.  THIS is entertainment!  What other show do you hear "Take my helmet off, I'm going to throw up?"  Not the Real Housewives of Orange County, that's for sure!  Are they trained for combat riding a horse while having their coach smack them in the shoulder with an aluminum baseball bat?  I think not.

Although the competition is early on, I'm eagerly anticipating the blood and warfare that's going to ensue, once these maniacs actually learn how to wield their jousts and control their horses!  And the best part?  Once eliminated, the contestant who got the boot has the opportunity to stick around and train, so that 'in the case' that a fellow contestant can no longer compete, he can swing back in and take his place.  You know that's going to happen!!  Bring it on Sir Lancelot!

And bonus event?  While we were watching this magnificent game show, MamaSlice was enjoying the competition with SistahSlice as well!  That's family bonding at it's best!

Until next Sunday's Funday...